February 2012
clavid:
i named my butthole lemony snicket because i want you to do a series of unfortunate things to it
Tourist: Could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
New Yorker: No, but I could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant.
New Yorker laughs so hard he falls over in the street. This is the funniest thing he's ever said. As the tourist looks on in wonder, a lone tear slides down the New Yorker's face. Nothing he ever says will ever compare to this one shining moment of hilarity.
2 tags
2 tags
quattrovagina:
when youre walking fast and the person right in front of you just stops out of no where
going through my old art
me: what the fuck is this
me: what is wrong with that arm
me: why did I draw him with those clothes
me: was I high when I drew this
1 tag
france: ten
france: twenty
france: thirty
france: forty
france: fifty
france: sixty
france:
france:
france: sixty ten
world: france what are you do—
france: four twenties
world: france stop it
france: four twenties ten
world: france that doesn't even make any sense
france:
france:
france:
world:
france:
world:
france: hundred.
2 tags
fauvists:
and the nominees for best country song are:
my farm
farm of mine
farm sweet farm
back to the farm
teardrops on my farm
me: I'm so full omg I'm not gonna eat for days
me: are those brownies
black person:
me: shouldn't you be in jail
tylerblackk:
iamamiwhoami 9.20.19.13.5.723378 I...
meatmodel:
what is so silly about a goose
widowmakers:
notgeorgefocaccia:
hussieslips:
fullmooney:
it’s just universally accepted that band geeks is the best episode of spongebob
ya pretty much
i thought i was the only one
yes
deansdickfreckles:
where are you taking those children
quinsee:
how do people not bite their nails i cant understand
basedmexican:
when girls describe themselves as “random”